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Tuesday, November 17th, 2009

Jonas stories

Jonas called for me about 5:30 a.m. morning. I was just happy he didn't call earlier. I went in and this was the conversation.
Me: Do you need to go pee?
J: No. I just want to cuddle.
M: Are you sure you don't need to pee?
J: Yes!

So I climb into his bed.

J: Mommy, do you want to hear the dream I was having.
M: Sweetie, we should really try to go back to sleep.
J: It's really funny.
M: Okay.
J: I was dreaming that I kept turning off the water and it kept turning back on all by itself!! Isn't that funny?
M: Are you *sure* you don't have to go pee?
J: Yes.

Five minutes of restless quiet passes.

J: Mommy, I need to pee.

That was story one. Story two is much less funny and kind of gets to me. Makes me wonder about my parenting. See, Jonas' school is collecting money to buy something through Heifer International. Their original goal was to collect $20 in change to buy a family some chickens. Kids brought in spare change to fill a jar. Well that didn't take long, and now they've got a loftier goal of $120 to buy a goat for a family.
Well, Jonas and I were talking about whether he wanted to give any money to the jar to help the families that don't have enough food. After some discussion, it pretty much ended with Jonas saying he didn't want to give any money. He only wanted to share his money with our family. I suspect it has something to do with the fact that I tell him all the time that we can't buy a new toy every day at Toys R Us, because he seems to want to. And I know he's only 4. But it is a little sad/frustrating to wonder what I can do to impart the values I want to.

Tags:  boys
Love the AM story--that is funny.

I have a hard time imagining a 4 year old mind being that conscious of money and understanding it. Maybe I'm thinking of our ages back when and forgetting that kids are so much more conscious of things at earlier ages these days due to more exposure to more things.
LGrant   Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Oh you totally shouldn't worry about that kind of stuff at 4! if he was like 10 or 11 saying these things then you need to worry. I think that is a hard concept for kids to get & understand. Don't beat yourself up - sounds like you guys have great kids who want to cuddle! you can't beat that!
Moore Crazies   Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Children can't fully understand the concept of sympathy or empathy until they are between the ages of 10-13 years old. I know that sounds completely ridiculous, but it's totally true! So at four years old, Jonas doesn't have the cognitive capacity beyond himself, so the fact that he even wanted to share with you, Daddy and Gareth is pretty good!
Angi   Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Sounds like he understands just enough, as any 4 yo should. It is good to be frugal and explain it to kids, in my opinion. I have a friend who buys her daughter something everytime they go anywhere. The expectation is there now and honestly, it's quite irritating. He'll get a little older and understand the "not getting a toy" isn't because of money, and if it is, that doens't mean you're broke.

Don't fret. Sounds like you're doing and saying the same things most parents do and say. :)
Richie & Ashley   Tuesday, November 17, 2009
From what I know, you seem like a terrific parent. He is just going through that phase that every kid his age does, the "mine" phase. He will come around.
niki   Tuesday, November 17, 2009
i'm 45 and i still don't understand the concepts of sympathy or empathy, but i'm doing alright. and that's all that matters.

walt   Tuesday, November 17, 2009
He wants to take care of his family first, good boy!
dannie   Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Thanks for all the comments! It is nice to get an outside perspective. =)
girlcarew   Wednesday, November 18, 2009
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