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Thursday, December 13th, 2012

A Beginning, Middle, and End

Four precious children have kept our lives busy lately. Four beautiful, special, bright children.

Today was the beginning of Joseph's journey to become our son. We signed the official intent to adopt papers at a meeting this morning. It's just the first step in a marathon, but it felt good to meet his adoption worker and hear what's to come. Of course the appeal slows things down majorly, but they are able to begin the adoption paperwork during the wait so we'll be ready to proceed quickly once the appeal is dismissed.

Usually S and I are spectators to these sort of meetings as they are for the child and their parents. Today we were the parents. It felt odd (and I made sure we all looked extra nice as I was afraid someone would think we had our child in foster care!) But it was very pleasant to enter that building and not be surrounded by all the drama and hurt and anger that we usually experience there. Today was about hope and the future and our beautiful little family. We've been told many times that we are extremely lucky to have been placed with a healthy, smart, beautiful baby boy for adoption. It doesn't happen very often. I know, though, that it was meant to be. Joseph belongs here. No doubt. I wish you could see us all together. We fit perfectly.

As Joseph's story begins we are in the middle of the saga of our life with the girls. The aunt has continued to stay in contact and we plan to get the girls for several hours on Saturday. This will be our second meeting with them and the first time we've had them alone. We are holding our breath that everything will go smoothly and easily. I know spending time with them alone will make them seem much more real to us again. Though the first meeting was a dream come true, it was quite emotional. I have to let go of the little girls imprinted on my heart. They have been frozen in time for me for many, many months. Those little girls no longer exist as I remember them. And that is hard to accept. But they have grown into two beautiful, sweet girls that I can still love and hold and nurture. And I can't wait to get to know those little girls more and more.

And another story ends. LG got on a plane this morning around 6:30. He's flying to the northwest to live with his great aunt and uncle. Our house is too quiet already. We all, especially Joseph, will miss that little ball of life and love immensely. He was our laughter, our excitement, and our supreme little chatterbox. He drove us absolutely insane sometimes and melted our heart completely other times. He is a beautiful boy and deserves just what we pray he has gotten....someone to love him and nurture him and protect him all of his days. He was excited and nervous and sad all at the same time about this move. We worked hard to make sure he knew we love him, they love him, we will miss him terribly, but we are so happy he is going home. He had questions and he wanted lots of hugs and he told us he loves us a hundred times, but I feel it will go as well as it could. I'm so happy we got to be a part of his life and were able to give him the things he needed while he needed us.

Those are our stories for now. We're planning on celebrating a special first Christmas with our dear, sweet son while holding 3 other little miracles close to our hearts. I think back to just 3 Christmases ago when we so longed for the blessing of children in our lives. God answered our prayers in His own way and His own time. We are thankful. Merry Christmas to those of you who read this!

I have tears in my eyes after reading this. I know the love you have for the girls and LG. I am so glad that the aunt has kept in touch with you and I'm hoping everything works out this weekend so you'll be able to spend time with them. You and your husband have provided all of these children with much needed love, attention and security. Without you who knows where any of them would be right now. You say you've been blessed -- I believe that, but I also think those children were blessed to have been placed with you. Merry Christmas! Enjoy every second of it with your son!
Jules   Thursday, December 13, 2012
I can imagine the joy it must bring you to see the girls again. I hope you are able to continue to be a part of theirs lives.
I cannot imagine how hard it was to let LG go. He will forever be in your hearts. I hope as much as you that he is going to a wonderful new family.
And congrats on starting the adoption.
Such dramatic changes. A plethora of emotions.
girlcarew   Thursday, December 13, 2012
Tears of joy and sadness. I am grateful that you and your husband are in this world, loving and caring for these children. It warms my heart and soul. I think Joseph is your reward.
pegi   Friday, December 14, 2012
Your heart must be made of super glue. My heart breaks and repairs over and over reading your blogs.
Happy Holidays and enjoy!
Spike   Sunday, December 16, 2012
Merry Christmas and wishes for joy and peace...
Angi   Monday, December 17, 2012
You deserve much happiness as you forge your lives with your son.I agree with ever comment that has beeen made and am sitting here just boohooing as my husband ask me what is wrong-it is what's right that brings these tears. God Bless You.
Dannie   Friday, December 28, 2012
The emotion your hearts are able to handle just leave me speechless. I am over the moon about the adoption process for you and S. My heart smiles and breaks all at the same time about the girls. I hope the aunt can continue to be a bridge for you guys. Many prayers. :)
Richie & Ashley   Saturday, January 5, 2013
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